the garden slug

It’s greenish for St Patrick’s Day, a day for festive boozing
And Garden Slugs are never slow for fun and song and shmoozing.
Tho’ no sane Slug has ever kissed the blessed Blarney Stone,
There is no lack of yakety-yak or puns to make you groan.

So put your shamrock on your button, your green shirt on your back,
and hit the road to Lorong L for beer or meal or snack.
We cannot know if leprechauns will serve you at your table
But we will cook a yummy feast and feed you what we’re able.

by Shireen Lim (a.k.a. resident Poet Slug)
–

Shireen is full-time mother, gardener, cook, baker and ice-cream maker, and Part-Time Slug. She is also the proud owner of a bright orange bicycle.

by Shireen Lim

Mary had a little lamb,
Some kind of fusion ‘pho’,
But she had longings for this dish
so to the Slug she’ll go.

Mary’s lamb is not for school,
Is not for faint of heart
Mary’s lamb is major food
for soul… and every body part.

–

Shireen is full-time mother, gardener, cook, baker and ice-cream maker, and part-time Slug. She cycles to TGS mostly weekdays mornings on a bright orange bicycle. If you look up “AWSUM” in the dictionary you’d see Shireen’s picture.

by Shireen Lim

How the Chowder Came to Be:
Cindy’s souper Golden Pumpkin Chowder
From the insides of her fancy carriage
Her thrifty godma (who never ever takes a powder),
While the girlie danced and dreamed of marriage,

transferred quickly to a large-ish pot.
From a giant book of magick potions,
a book well-thumbed, though dog-eared not,
and stained with ointments and sticky lotions

-but I digress- checked up a sekret recipe
the original and one and only pumpkin chowder
made to please a hungry girl or three.
As the midnight clock chimes loud and louder.

As we stir the sluggy soup pot with a sekret smile,
We have a friend who has a friend who knows
A thing or two about magick, and serve with style
Godmother’s soup passed off as Joe’s.

–

Come by weekday mornings to have a chit chat and/or poetry slam with former educator and now Resident Poet cum Barista, Shireen Slug

#fitfoodtgs

.. is a year filled with nothing but happyness and gratitude.

to be so strong that nothing can disturb our peace of mind..
to talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person we meet..
to make all our friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them..

to look at the sunny side of everything and make our optimism come true.

to think only of the best, to work only for the best
and to expect only the best

to be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as we are about our own

to forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the
greater achievements of the future..

to wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature we meet

To give so much time to improving ourselves that we have no time to criticise others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of ourselves and to proclaim this fact fo the world,
not in loud words, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on our side,
so long as we are true to the best that is in us.

/modified Optimist Creed by Christian D. Larson

We’ve celebrated so many Slug birthdays and we’ve yet to catch up on our blog posts of each one of them. Thinking if we should attempt to post ALL our Slugs’ birthday pics, one way or another. More for our own self-amusement and a public record of our so-called “Slug culture” than anything else hurhur. One thing’s for sure – there are only more birthdays to come.

Happy birthday Bonnie Slug – you’re so lucky you neh kena sabo like all the other Slugs. U WATCH OUTTTTT!!!

One of the best rewards we look forward to each year, is the annual hygiene and cleanliness grading letter (haha! We got two letters, geddit? A written letter and the letter “A”! *snort*) from the National Environment Agency.

More than anything, this is a validation of our Slugs’ hard work and diligence in upholding and adhering to our daily, weekly and monthly housekeeping duties.

However, the biggest thanks goes to you, our dear Slugphiles, who are generally very tidy and respectful customers. You make it easy for us to clean up after you, your children and your furkids. Most of you actually clean up after yourselves, and we’ve seen you teaching your offspring to do the same too. For that and so much more – thank you, thank you, thank you!

Here’s to a clean, kind and gracious Singapore

We’ll make this Le Short and Le Sweet. We are sibeh busy now preparing for tonight’s partayyyy and we can barely contain our excitements! *squeeeeeeeee* (sibeh busy still got time to write blog post hor? anyhoo.)

Le Food Table sans food. We will bring out Le Food when Le Party begins to ensure Le Food be Le Fresh for all Le Slugphiles.

Le Thousands of Le Googly Sluggy Eyeballz. Okay maybe not thousands, we exaggerates. Is it only in Le Hundreds. But all we handmake one hokay, dun play-play.

Le Bouquet from LE TWO QUEENS! In shape of Le Garden Slug!! *Le Swoon* Le Eye Stalks are made out of a real plant. Sibeh creative leh, we loves! <3

Two Queens ah Two Queens, why y’all so sweeeeeetttt? We will cry one leh :’) *sniffles*

Le Love Missive from Le Two Queens. HOMG they’ve even caught on to Le Lingo! *Le Double Swoon*

Le Party Packs, Le Door Gifts and Le Miscellaneous Party Items.

Le Prizes. Whatchy’all been waitin’ for, riiiiight?

SEE YOUSE IN JUST A BIT!!! ***LE MANY EXCITES***

I guess it’s going to become Le Sluggy Tradition now, to throw youse a Slugalicious party once a year to celebrate our birthday.

We turned five on 8 December 2011, however, we were too busy watching Le Turkey TV to organise something for youse, our dearest and darlingest Slugphiles. We knew we weren’t gonna be able to get away with it, so we consulted Le Stars in Le Eastern Sky and picked Le Most Auspicious date to celebrate — Wednesday, 4 January 2012. That’s like, merely a few days away! (RSVP details available after a few more paragraphs of mindless drivel. Or scroll down lah if you can’t wait >.< )

Can you believe it? That we’ve been around for five whole years? ‘Coz we can’t believe it ourselves.

We opened Le Shoppe on 8 December 2006. We completely forgot about our 1st birthday. Our 2nd birthday went by just as quietly. We wrote a teary post (probably one of our best posts ever) on how we wouldn’t trade you for a million dollars. We decided to celebrate our 3rd because good things come in threes, right? And finally last year, we decided to celebrate with a bang. It was the single most memorable night for us last year. Many of youse came by to share love and laughs, and we hope you’ll do the same again!

So here we are, Le Five Years Old.

Awsum artwork by Mishal “Noodle” Slug

Le TGS Fan Night 2012
Le Date & Le Time: Wednesday 4 January 2012, registration starts at 6.30pm

Le Theme: Come dressed in Sluggy Olive Green or Sluggy Yellow! (refer to our awsum logo for reference).

What can we has other than everyone dressed in green and yellow? Here iz what we can has.

We can has all your favourite foodses and drinkses.

We can has Le Painstakingly Handmade Door-gift for each of youse.

What are they? They are Le Googly Sluggy Eyeballz of coz!

This is how you put it on. It’ll go perfectly with your Sluggy Olive Green and/or Sluggy Yellow outfit. Trust us Le Fashionista Slugs.

Le Googly Sluggy Eyeballz sans pupils on Le Joseph Slug’s hemsem head

We can has Le Awsum Hug Ticket for each of youse! Basically you can go up to anyone at the party, present them with this ticket to redeem a hug. (Now everybody say, “Awwwwww….”). Yep, that’s us. Always doing our bit to spread Le Loves.

Three lucky (randomly chosen) people will get a special “golden ticket” each, which allows them to redeem a special hug such as:
• Le Bear Hug
• Le Hug With Kiss
• Le Snuggle

*many excites!*

Now remember to keep Le Hug Ticket with you, because we shall be using Le Ticket Serial Number for Le Lucky Draw Prizes! Le Exciting neh! Ooh how Le Clever we are.

We can has special guests like Le Ice Cream Man and Le Tarot Card Reader.
 

We can has good, clean, dorky-adorable games like Le Treasure Hunt, Le “Banned Words” and Le Broken Telephone Line.

Don’t look at me, I’ve no idea what a Broken Telephone Line game is. It is all planned by Le Young Slugs as they will be taking charge of Le Fan Night. Le Old Slugs will simply meander around all night doing what we do best – pretending to act like bossly bosses.

Le Food, Le Drinks, Le Music and Le Good-Looking Slugs are all on da house, yo. So chop-chop-kalipok fasterly RSVP as we’ve only got space for 60-odd Slugphiles.

HOW TO LE RSVP
• Limited to the first 60 peoples
• RSVP by Monday 2 Jan 2012 5.00pm to justask@thegardenslug.com with the subject “TGS Fan Night 2012″.
• Include your name & contact number – limited to 1pax per reservation. (So if you’re coming in a group, each of you has to RSVP individually hokay? Dun be lazy.)

• You may also RSVP via SMS to 9225-7913

CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YA!! Le K and Le Thanx and Le Bye!

For the uninitiated, we shall translate our inscrutable slugspeak for you:
hemsem = handsome
oktober = october
slugbabies = young slugs below the age of 25

Slugspeak is so cryptic even Google Translate cannot helpch you. We know this because we tried.

[click on image to enlarge]

Google thinks it’s German. German??!?! Pfffft.

Anyhoo.

We celebrated many a Slug birthday this month.

The first Slug birthday was Mathew Slug’s. But because you went to Bangkok without us to celebrate your birthday, dear Mathew boy, you no can has 15 seconds of fame on this here Slug-pimping slug blog. HNG!! Happy birthday nonetheless. *tosses hair*

There was a double celebration for Havard Slug and Ankit Slug.

This is neither Havard nor Ankit, by the way. This is Joseph Slug shamelessly hijacking posing with a birthday cake that’s not his. Joe may be hemsem but he is neither a slugbaby nor an October baby. JOE YOU HAVE TO WAIT TILL DECEMBER HOKAY? PATIENNNNNNCE!!!!

The real birthday boys.

L-R: Havard Slug & Ankit Slug.

You may not always see Havard Slug, hemsem as he is, because he is one of our Kitchen Slugs and as far as Kitchen Slugs go, they are usually, um, in the kitchen. He may make appearances for his fanbase on special request, though. Kindly submit your requests via telepathy. Thank you.

We also celebrated Shawn Slug’s birthday last week.

No shameless cake-hijacking this time ’round.

Legend has it that Shawn Slug ate a record-breaking two plates of fried rice, seven pieces of KFC, two chicken pies, and two pieces of birthday cake. In one sitting.

One cannot help but wonder where all the food goes. We joke that one day Shawn Slug may eat us to the poorhouse. *uncomfortable laughter*

Some of the Young Slugs played a good prank on Shawn Slug on his birthday, but we’ll let you ask Shawn about that personally when you see him HEHE