Order breakfast for dinner tonight and stand to win a Singlish ‘Three Little Pigs’

Three Little Pigs by The Garden Slug

Aaron D’Cruz
April 26, 2017

Lemme ask you something.

Do you….
Hate taking part in dumbass quizzes?
Loathe giving out your email address, ’coz you know it’s only gonna result in us sending you more dumbass quizzes??
LOVE our artery-clogging 3 Little Pigs and wish you could be rewarded with something than just calories & guilt every time you devour it??? (perhaps something “intellectually”-rewarding that’s made of….hmm…. dead trees, maybe?)

If you answered YES to all of the above, then do this:

1.) From today until Sunday (30.4.2017), order your favourite hangover-curing Three Little Pigs on Deliveroo, Foodpanda, UberEats, Honestbee, or WhatToEat.

2.) On your delivery order’s “Comments” / “Allergy notes” / “Instructions” section, or wherever they might allow you to write something — make sure you type in or copy & paste this code-phrase:

I’ve ordered a 3LP and I want to win a 3LPLah storybook!

That’s it! As easy as 1 – 2 – 3 Little Pigs! (see what I did there…*snorts*)

3LPLahlookinside
[pic: excerpt from book]
Every order entitles you a chance to win a brand new copy of “The Three Little Pigs Lah” storybook by Casey Chen. Every day, five winners are picked and the prize is immediately packed together with your delivery order!

There’s no limit to how many times you can enter this lucky draw. As long as you
a.) order a 3LP via delivery, and
b.) enter the magic words in the Instructions/comments box,
you can stand to win again!
What this means is that the MORE you order… the BETTER your chances.

Where to order 3 Little Pigs:

   

(the first three service the Katong / Bedok / Geylang area, and What To Eat delivers island-wide

If you already get food delivered regularly, then wah, bonus lor!

Like Sondra P., one of Monday’s five winners, who sent us a pic and wrote:

The Three Little Pigs “Lah” is totally LOL! Enjoyed flipping thru the pages while huffing & puffing over my 3Little Pigs late dinner… after the kids went to bed, of course. P/S- I will gift it to them once they turn 18! Ha haaa!

SondraP 3LP letter
[pic by Sondra P.]
So, because this Sondra P. pecah lubang, now errone knows that other than a Singlish story book, lucky winners get a little bonus gift as well.

Yes, I meant the handwritten letter la… (how RARE is that in 2017, dude??). The $10 gift card is just a by-the-way thing, pfffft.

Order Three Little Pigs today

from any of these deliverators:
   


 

Five lucky persons PER DAY stand to win:

✔ A copy of “The Three Little Pigs Lah” by Casey Chen

✔ $10 coupon code from Dough Empire

✔ painstakingly handwritten letter from yours truly

Giveaway ends April 30, 2017 9:30pm SGT. Prizes awarded daily.

3 Little Pigs (actually, no, it’s 12 Little Pigs) giveaway worth $61.16

The Three Little Pigs Lah by Casey Chen

WINNER: DOROTHEE

CONGRATULATIONS!

Email to winning winner has been sent.

Part 2 of the Three Little Pigs giveaway has now begun (24 – 30 April 2017). Scroll down to read about how you can participate in Part 2. Prizes given out daily!


Aaron D’Cruz
April 19, 2017

My stupid friend asked me:
”Hey you Big Fat Lazy Slug… whatcha doing this weekend… SLUGGING OUT?? hahaha…”

IMMEDIATELY I did two things:
1.) I slapped him in the mouth
2.) Replied, ”I’m working a 12-hour shift dumbass. And when I have a spare minute, imma crawl into the storeroom under the staircase and count how many storybooks I overstocked last month.”

This Fat Slug may not know what a ”Diet” is but I sure as hell know how to over-order. And that includes books, too, apparently [eyeroll emoji]

Let’s cut to the chase, Young Slug-ling. After all, you’ve only set aside 45 seconds to skim this. Help me find a good home for these brand new storybooks before Cowboy uses them as bedding and/or a scratch-post.


I want to give away a special book called ’The Three Little Pigs Lah”!

This is a book that’s close to our cholesterol-filled hearts. Because it involves talking animals, drama and tragedy that would put any Korean tv series to shame. Plus, it’s written in full-on Singlish!

But Sluggieeeeeee… that’s hardly a giveaway worthy of my 45 seconds!” you annoyingly retort..

For starters, the winner of this giveaway will receive 1 x signed copy of ”The Three Little Pigs Lah” storybook AND a voucher for 2 x Three Little Pigs (yes, that awesome breakfast dish).

I can already hear you starting to whine: ”But but but that makes it 9 Little Pigs! You are misleading your customers!”

I hear you Young Slug-ling. You’re correct… and your P1 Math teacher will be very proud.

Hmmm… well it juuusssttt soooo happeeennnnss this Fat Slug over-stocked a grand total of 37 copies of ”The Three Little Pigs Lah”… *winces*

OK, pay attention.

This giveaway is two parts:
PART 1.) Where there can be only one…

…winner of the signed copy and 3LP dine-in vouchers. Participate by answering a simple question below (scroll alllll the way down), and voila! You’ll the know the result by Mon 24 Apr 2017, 3:00pm.

PART 2.) is for those who answer YES to the following 3 questions:
✔ Hate taking part in dumbass quizzes?
✔✔ Loathe giving out your email address, ’coz you know it’s only gonna result in me sending you more stupid quizzes like this??
✔✔✔ LOVE our 3 Little Pigs and wish you could be rewarded with something MORE than just calories & guilt every time you order it??? (like, dead trees?)

Then do this:
From 24th-30th Apr 2017, order our 3 Little Pigs on Deliveroo, Foodpanda, UberEats, Honestbee, or WhatToEat. Every order entitles you a chance to win a brand new copy of ”The Three Little Pigs Lah” storybook by Casey Chen.

And! On your delivery order’s ”Comments” / ”Allergy notes” / ”Instructions” section, or wherever they might allow you to write something — make sure you copy & paste this code-phrase:

I’ve ordered a 3LP and I want to win a 3LPLah storybook!

We’ll pick a few winners each day and pack the book together with the delivery order! And we’ll keep doing it every day from 24-30 April or until we run out 🙂

There’s no limit to how many times you can enter this lucky book draw. As long as you
a.) order a 3LP via delivery
b.) enter the magic words in the Instructions/comments box
you can stand to win again!
What this means is that the MORE you order… the BETTER your chances.

So it’s come down to this…

You’re staring indecision in the face (kinda like that ”Blue Pill vs Red Pill” scene in The Matrix.)…
To try for PART 1 or PART 2 of this porky giveaway?

Well, guess what. PLOT TWIST! Bet nobody told you you could have BOTH the Blue Pill AND the Red Pill, right?? Nyahaha! If you swallow ’em both you turn into a purple cow. OK nvm, we digress.

Anyhoo… yes, you can participate in both. For PART 1: You may enter once, although, you may share as many times as you like. Each share or referral begets you another 3 entries! For PART 2: enter as many times as you wish.
All the best, Young Slug-ling!

Sincerely,
The Chief Slug

P.S. This book is soldoutalmosteverywhere. This makes it a precious collectible!

P.P.S. If you are parenting a youngling, this book may not be suitable for children. If you don’t want them cussing in Singlish, hide it from them! Or pray that you won’t win!!

3LPLahlookinside

The Three Little Pigs Lah signed copy
signed by author Casey Chen!

A Clockwork Orange @ Esplanade Theatre — The Garden Slug’s Halloween Giveaway!

“Funny, disturbing, frightening and thrilling… a masterpiece” — Daily Star

Honestly, we’re giving this away for Halloween because of the words ‘frightening’ and ‘horror’ in the blurbs. That’s how shallow we are. But also… THAR BE MUSKLES. WHO DOESN’T LIEK MUSKLES! Hurhur.

ANYHOO.

Start obligatory blurb…

This electrifying and testosterone-filled physical theatre ‘horror show’ exquisitely captures and transcends the spirit of Anthony Burgess’s original literary masterpiece, 50 years on from its publication.

clockwork hunk

A Clockwork Orange lures its audience into the glorious glass-edged nastiness of Manchester’s underworld. A playtime of orgiastic ultraviolence and sexuality, it is the story of little Alex and his Droogs in their battle against the tedium of adolescence.

clockwork orange

An unapologetic jubilation of the human condition, it remains as terrifyingly relevant today as when the book was published in 1962 and when the Stanley Kubrick’s film caused a stir in 1971.

… end obligatory blurb.

Admit it. You didn’t read a word and scrolled through the eye candy only.

So, if you’re into muscles, milk and guyliner – enter our horrific Halloween Giveaway – you might just win yourselves a pair of tickets worth $264 for the opening show on Wed 4 Nov, 8pm. All you have to do is answer one easy question, and share it with your friends.

clockwork milk

The contest closes on Halloween itself, Sat 31 Oct, 6pm. The Winner will be announced the next day, Sun 1 Nov at 10am-ish.

Click here to enter now!

Aside from that, if you were planning to get tickets anyway — HOLD YOUR HORSES — we can helpchu get it cheaper!

Simply drop by ours to pick up a physical copy of this flyer:
Flyer Front
Why, you ask? Our flyer is muy especial because it contains a discount for 10% off the ticket price. With the savings you can buy more guyliner.

Okay, that is all. Take part now. Byez.

Last month I built a solid, wooden stage with my bare hands…

JJ and The Paperplanes Fri 5 Dec, 8pm (one night only) The Garden Slug
JJ and The Paperplanes
Fri 5 Dec, 8pm (one night only)
The Garden Slug

Last month I built a solid, six-by-four wooden stage with my bare hands… just so I can invite fresh skinny talents like JJ and The Paperplanes come pluck guitar and stomp around for you while you quaff your ciders and shovel down those truffle fries.

JJ and the who?

JJ and The Paperplanes, you ninny. It is a Pop Punk band from Singapore that’s as real as the food we serve, with none of that ‘I’m an artiste’ pretension.
Continue reading “Last month I built a solid, wooden stage with my bare hands…”

Mar 5-9 specials: Ohm, zen, mushrooms, chai

If last week’s specials were all about booze & bacon, this week it’s all ohm and zen… masala chai, mega mushroom platter, pumpkin chowder, larb… that sort of thing.

Let us know if you enjoyed this week’s specials, coz we had a lot of fun creating them and giving each other smexy names 😛

Reservations:
• Slugline 86888575
• Online http://bit.ly/chopeslug

soup of the day: golden herb-roasted pumpkin chowder, by Wen Wu “Smexy Eyebrows” Slug
golden herb-roasted pumpkin chowder
Lightly drizzled w extra virgin olive oil & scattering of pumpkin seeds

share-share special: THE ULTIMATE SHROOMGASM, by Jo-Anne “The Lady” Slug (you know, like Aung San Suu Kyi? If you see her, you’ll know what we mean ^_^ )
The Ultimate Shroomgasm
The ultimate happyness medley of Mushroom Munchkins, Sichuan-peppered Shiitake Tempura, Grilled Portobello and Trio Mushroom Stroganoff Crostini. Served w TRUFFLE GARLIC MAYO for the ultimate shroomgasm!

all day brunch special: “I Larb You”, by Vun Kien “Heartbreaker” Slug
"I Larb You"
Thai-inspired minched chicken salad on sunny-side-up eggs, served w grilled mushroom duo & fresh garden salad by side

Addendum: Vun Kien Slug says he’s usually the “heartbroken”, not the heartbreaker! Ohkay… we’ll take his word for it….

OHM ZEN beverage special: Sekret Spice Masala Chai
sekret spice masala chai
Our daily 5pm tea break special which USED TO BE enjoyed by Slugs & Slugs only… If you wanted it you’d have to sign up to be a slug-slave!! Now is to be shared with the whole wide world. Le sigh. Enjoy.

All our specials at a glance
Mar 5-9 specials

Easter Egg for blog readers who read till the end!!! We haven’t done this in awhile!

So guess what?? Wah we have 3500 followers on FB?!! Unimaginable. Thank you, thank you, thank you! We feel like this calls for a celebration. But how should we celebrate??
3500 Facebook likes!

A mini contest? Haven’t had those in awhile. Okay a mini contest it is.

So we wrangled can has 7 x $50 cash coupons to give away. Essentially it is a bribe to get you to have a blind date or two with our rustic little online bakery, Dough Empire.
Bake Love, Not War
0) Go visit our cyberbakery (if you haven’t already) → Dough Empire
1) Answer seven little questions → Survey! Halp!
2) We’ll pick seven lucky weiners whiners winners and announce here next weekend!
3) Do something nice for someone today.

That is all!

If you like easter eggs, let us know in the comments >_< !